Bath Parklife Alleycat Report
A few weeks back Me and Owen hit Bath to race in our first out of town alleycat, it proved to be a day full of disasters. Neither of us had ever been to the city before so we decided the best plan was to just follow some locals then destroy them at the end with our masculine Welsh lungs that we are born with for all the singing that we do. The first three checkpoints were out of the way pretty quick then we got onto Joshua’s (of White Duck Screenprint) wheel, he was our chosen victim, we would be like nits, like ticks, like two out-of-towners cheating in an alleycat. We shot off like rockets, most people took the road but not us, we hit the bike path, Josh was sure that this was the best way to go to avoid the roadworks that everyone else was going to have to deal with. This path went on and on and on then KABOOM! Owen looked down to find that all his chainring bolts had fallen out, fuck knows how it happened but he was out of the race, we left him for dead.
It was soon apparent that we had chosen to take advantage of the wrong local because we had overshot our exit from the path and were pretty lost. After a fair few stops to consult the paper map I hap prepared the night before and the iPhone maps app we hit the furthest checkpoint, I was convinced that we were in first place because we hadn’t seen anyone for so long but the dude at the checkpoint said that 19 people were ahead of us, turns out we did about 5 extra miles. Had Josh figured out our plan? Had he loosened Owen’s bolts? Had he deliberately taken me around the houses?
We were pretty fast on the way back, we took it in turns to push the pace, I tried to wear my (now) opponent down. The final hill to the last checkpoint was a killer, we rode a third, walked a third then rode the last stretch determined to enter the park by wheel and not by foot. Josh edged ahead during our three laps of the ‘antidrome’, I pushed as hard as I could but I couldn’t catch the bastard, his lady and kids were waiting for him at the line, I had nothing to finish for now but the hope that I wasn’t last (I wasn’t, Graeme was still lost).
Well, there you go, that is my account from the back of the race, go here to see photos and read about the front of the race by Dave who came first. I think the moral of this story is to make sure all your nuts and bolts are tight, that if you plan on following a local make sure that they know EXACTLY where they are going, and finally, that you will have the energy to pip them at the post and take all the glory. Big thanks to the Fixed Gear Bath boys, all the sponsors: Whiteduck, John’s Bikes, Cadence, Freshtripe, 14 Bike Co, HubJub, Velo Solo and Prendas and last but not least Josh for not happy slapping me after he reads this, haha.
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